This is something I’ve been meaning to mention for about two weeks now, but I’m just now getting around to it.
Being quite non-interested in politics, the only things I know about Orrin Hatch are that he’s a Utah senator and there was an uproar a few years ago when he wanted to be able to invade computers suspected of housing pirated music files.
I first saw one of his billboards when I was in Salt Lake City on business, and have since noticed that he has two billboards adorning my daily drive to work. Both of these billboards share a common theme: a dictionary-style approach to a theme that supposedly defines who he is. They also share another common theme: they were designed by people who apparently don’t know how dictionaries work.
Each has a picture of Mr. Orrin. The first says:
gutsy (gutse) adj.
1: courage, grit
2: tough
The second says:
heart (hart) n.
1: dedicated, loyal
2: caring
What is wrong with the people that wrote this? You don’t define an adjective by using a noun, and vice versa. Let’s try and use the definitions of Hatch’s qualities in some sentences.
"Hey, did you hear about that Orrin Hatch? He sure is courage!"
"Yeah, what a great dedicated he has!"
"I wish I was as grit as Orrin."
"Learn to open your loyal, and you can be."
In the billboard writers’ defense, the second definition of each word works, though "tough" works quite a bit better in lieu of "gutsy" than does "caring" as opposed to "heart." But are secondary definitions going to cut it? Are these egregious crimes the result of our state education fund?
I’m shocked and appalled–as is the only way to be in Utah Valley–at the use of my tax dollars. Excuse me while I go cry a little bit.